Saturday, August 17, 2013

Emailed question from a Hoboken Mom:

 "My Nanny has been showing up to work late for the past 5 days.  It's only about 15 minutes, but she has no real excuse.  I need to get to work on time.  What should i do?"

Ahh, the unreliable Nanny.  She's probably a Church Square park bench Nanny.  Only kidding...but seriously, I hope she isn't.  
I am sure you asked her the obvious: "Why are you late?"  If she has no was a car accident on the Westside Highway, the E train was running late, blah blah blah...I would give her a warning.  A warning includes 1) you are unable to pay her for the time she is late or 2)you can scare her with letting her go because you need someone to depend on. I'm not sure how long she has been with your family, but she should know that her showing up on time gives you enough time to get to work when you're supposed to. There should be no tolerance for tardiness.  Your job enables her to watch your kids.  Her job is being there for you and your family. Plus, timing is everything in the NYC/Hoboken area.  5 minutes late and you can miss your next meeting!

A late Nanny is a not-so-good Nanny.  

Thank you for your question!  For more questions, email me at




There have been times in my Nanny career that I completely disagreed with a parent.  Specifically, when parents let their kids climb on tables and jump off chairs, or didn't reprimand bad language.  To me, that is completely disrespectful and not good behavior to encourage(who doesn't agree with that?!).  And then there comes a time when no matter what the Nanny says, the kids will only listen to their parents when they are around.  So, there's no point in trying to teach them the right thing.  

I always found it very discouraging when a parent didn't take my side on good behavior.  Maybe I'm a stickler, and it's okay to have fun, but it's not okay to become a gross disrespectful human being.  Parents should be the model, while the Nanny continues the same behavior.  Not, the Nanny should be the model and the parents continue the behavior.  Kids want to be their parents!

Be the teacher, not the follower.  If you, the parent, need help on how to interact with your child and guide them to become nice, respectful adults, ask your Nanny.  If your Nanny is a pig, find a new one!




As you've gathered, I hope, I have been a Nanny for many many years.  For some of the families, I've had a Nanny contract.  Other families, there was no contract, and often, some sticky situations. Situations like days off or pay raises.  While these are not earth shattering problems, it is very important to have everything discussed and written out to prevent awkward situations. 

The reality is, this is my occupation.  There was a situation where a family that I was nannying for decided(yes, last minute because they have another home) to take a two week vacation and left me high and dry.  No pay, barely a holiday bonus(a topic that I will tackle as holiday time comes!), and two weeks of nothing to do, since they told me last minute. Do you think that's fair?  Because I sure don't.  I have bills, mortgage, groceries, and life to pay for.  Two weeks of no pay is a bomb to my bank account.  

To be fair, I know it was my fault that we didn't discuss paid days off.  I know, I know, I know!  This is a lesson that both Nannies and families should understand.  Nannies: make sure this is discussed!  Families: if you consider your Nanny as part of your family, treat them like it!